How to get what you want: The Guide to Personal Confidence

Everybody has wants in life. From financial success to those new jeans you saw at the mall, there are so many things that we just desire. While some people are just “go-getters” and will do what it takes to achieve their goals, others are a bit slow to grab what they want. It starts with your personal self esteem and confidence, and how you feel about yourself. You need to be able to believe in yourself to be able to get what you want. There are a bunch of different ways to achieve your goals and wants, and everybody has different strategies. Here are a few things that I put together to help you be the best you can be.

Setting Goals:  Your goal is essentially what you want, and sometimes that can’t be achieved. You need to be able to set appropriate goals for yourself, and make them something you can do. If you are trying to save up some money for a new phone, you don’t want your goal to be able to raise enough money in a week. That’s not something that’s really achievable unless you work at a really high paying job that makes $2,000 a week. Try for more like 3 months, depending on your lifestyle. Your goal should reflect on what you are physically, and mentally, able to do. However, don’t make it something that is easily achievable, or set lower expectations. This way, you won’t really get what you want, just the bare minimum. To set the ideal goal, it should be something that will take a lot of effort to achieve, but is not impossible. For more detailed steps on setting goals, see this article.

Be Prepared:  It’s easy to want things. It’s not easy, however, to be ready for these things. You could spend days, weeks, and even years dreaming about something only to realize that you are not ready for it. It’s best to know the risks and responsibilities of something before getting it, because then you enjoy it better. For example, if you are thinking of getting a pet. You know you want a dog and you have been thinking of getting one for a long time. But if you take a look at your bank account, you realize that you really can’t afford to care for an animal. By saving up for a dog (see above) you are more prepared and ready to financially handle what you want. Not only should you be financially ready, you should also be mentally prepared. Handling a dog is a time consuming job. You have to sacrifice somethings to be able to take care of it. By preparing yourself for something, it allows you to enjoy it even more.

Ask for Help:  By asking for help, you are not showing weakness. It takes a lot of strength and courage to let people know that you need a little assistance. Sometimes your goal requires you to ask other people for help, whether it’s from family and friends, or people you just met. Different situations require different conversations with others, but the goal is what you want. One thing is for sure: you won’t get what you want from other people if you don’t tell them, so talk to them! You shouldn’t have a completely independent mindset, where you feel as if you have to do everything by yourself. You also shouldn’t feel like you can’t do anything without other people, because then other people are completing your goal for you. Instead, try to do everything you can by yourself, and if you need help, ask!

~Medha

Basketball Recruit Asks Friend With Autism to Prom

In Louisville, Kentucky a high schooler named Trey Moses asked  Ellie Meredith, a girl who is dealing with autism, if she would go to prom with him. Rather than bringing his girlfriend, he decided to ask Ellie by bringing flowers inside their school’s gym and holding a sign that said “Let’s party like it’s 1989,” which is a Taylor Swift reference, one off Ellie’s favorite artists. When he was being interviewed, he explained that she knew him so well and despite what people may think, they are totally alike. Although Ellie was taken by surprise when Trey suggested that they go to prom together, she said that she knew that it would be something in Trey’s nature to do.

To me, this is really cute and shows a positive part of society. Everyone mainly focuses on race, gender, and religion when it comes to unfair equality but this can make humans finally realize that mental disabilities are another aspect. My hope is for viewers of this promposal to learn a lesson and start to act the same around everyone. Personally, this should already be happening but in reality it is not. Maybe one day, Trey’s actions can be viewed as something that isn’t a big deal because autism isn’t considered a “flaw.” Nonetheless, this story truly brings a sense of comfort because it shows that people aren’t always so self conscious on how others might view them. In conclusion, I say, be friends with whoever you want!

~Lara

The Causes and Effects of Bullying

I know you’ve heard this before, but bullying is a huge problem for many people all around the globe. Bullying is when one person or a group of people make rude comments towards another or harasses them repeatedly. Cyberbullying is when someone is harassing someone via text messaging, tweeting, IMing, or even video chatting.

Why Does the Bully bully?

There could be many causes for people to feel the need to bully someone. It could be that they were feeling annoyed or angry that day and needed to take their feelings out on someone else, or because there are things going on in the bully’s personal life that they think no one can understand, so they push people who are trying to help them away, and a last cause could be because they think that making fun of someone will get them into the “popular crowd” or make them look cool. Trust me, bullying someone will get you nothing.

So What Happens to the Victim?

When someone is thinking about harassing someone, they don’t think about how their words would impact the person they’re bullying. If the bullies’ words have a negative impact on the victim, it will be harder and take longer to brush off. Most bullying leads to stress, depression, low self-esteem, and, sadly, suicide. And what hurts me the most is that once the bully has seen how bad their words and actions have impacted him/her, they then start reaching out. Doesn’t make sense, right? If in the end you’re going to start feeling bad about what you did, why do it in the first place?

Bye-standers

Bystanders. Yes, I know I spelled it wrong up there, but you’ll see why in a second. Bystanders are people who witness the conviction happening, but do nothing about it. If you see something happening, tell an adult, teacher, guidance counselor, or the principal. Doing this won’t make you a tattletale, it will help stop the interrogation from continuing on. Please don’t stand there and watch without doing anything after. You could be the key to ending the problem, so why don’t you do just that?

~Emily