The Twin Brother I Never Had

I have never ceased in my aspiration for a twin brother.  I am the eldest of three girls.  My two younger sisters are identical mirror twins.  Often, my sisters would arouse my jealousy when I would ask to play with them and they would respond with “We don’t want to play with you,” or, “Well, we’re in the middle of a game…” and shut me out.  Even the ability to say ‘we’ was, in my eyes, a blessing of which I was deprived.

Whenever I would voice my opinions to my parents of my desire for a twin, they’d laugh and say, “It’s a bit late for that, don’t you think?”  I would laugh along with them, but inside I was crying, wallowing in my despair.

A few years back, when suddenly having a boy for a friend meant you were a package deal and boys and girls started to walk their separate ways, my ultimate wish went from just a twin to a male twin.  I guess I was lonely after loosing one of my best guy-friends to the evil clutches of deadly rumors and wanted some comfort, even if it was just my imagination gone wild.  I figured a boy my age who I was close with, who I could talk to in earnest without either of our friends reprimanding us, I could figure out the secrets to what makes guys tick.

I’m closer to my parents because of my lack of sisterly affection, but my parents con only teach me so much about social etiquette.  They were my age once, sure, but that was 30 to 40 years ago.  Things are very different now.  But if I had a brother who I could share secrets with, lean on both literally and metaphorically, and have him do the same with me, I feel I could walk this world with a little more confidence, in the knowledge that I am not alone.  But I would never trade my sisters for a twin of my own.

My parents meant to only have two kids.  Katie and Liz were not supposed to be twins.  I would – no – I could never trade anything for my sisters.  I’ll just have to make do with what I have, be grateful for it, and support my friend in appreciating and staying on good terms with her twin brother.

~Ariana Harris